Hello all, I am Michelle and I am a grateful recovering cross-addicted alcoholic. First I want to thank you all for reading my post and your help. I have worked very hard on my recovery and I have found this program and am grateful that it works for me. We have an outstanding home group full of love and support for one another - like a new family.

However, we have had an incident where one of our suffering members - fairly new to the group - 2 months. Has smelled of alcohol - and she brings a large cup with no lid full of what appears to be coca-cola with ice and a straw. When given hugs, she reaks of alcohol very strong, as well as her cup. We were not sure how to handle this, as we figured most people coming to our meetings, or ANY meetings would have sense enough to know that we are in a continuous struggling battle to recover from alcohol and drugs in our lives - for that 1 hour and 1/2 meeting - we assume people will not bring alcohol or drugs to that meeting.... makes no sense. But then again, we have the minds of an addict - and we remember far too well how we would lie or cheat to use. Although she is seeking help through our group - and we want to help. It's difficult for some of the members because they feel that she should atleast give some effort on her part - if she is to attend our meetings. What she is doing could cause a member to relapse, or to make them trigger, or possibly to make them think it's okay to use, and come to the meetings. We can't have any of these things happening. It is contradictory to the reason we are all there.

We struggled with this, because in our readings it states: "There is only one requirement - the "desire" to stop using." With that being said, this person does have the "desire" to stop using, and yet brings alcoholic beverages to the meeting. Our chair-person will always say at the beginning of the meeting: " Those that have used in the last 24 hours please refrain from speaking during the meeting, and we will be glad to talk to you after the meeting." She will never speak during the meeting, however, she makes frequent trips to the bathroom, and is stumbling around when she walks - obviously drunk. This really bothers some of our members.

Our issues are: We are all struggling like hell to stay clean. We go to these meetings as a chance to get away from alcohol or drugs and know that we are safe and secure from it while we meet. Members of our group are really mad about her bringing alcohol to the meeting, feeling that it is not fair to the rest of us - that are struggling enough as it is. Something like this just makes it harder for the other members to focus on why they are there, to stay clean. To get help and support from fellow members - not to have someone sitting there "using" while we are all desperately trying to "not use".

Our chair person has pulled her aside and talked to her about this, and told her that she can't bring alcohol to the meetings, and if she does, she will be asked to leave. She apologized, and then came to a few more meetings after the fact without alcohol. But that didn't last too long, she then started up again, thinking no one would notice, and is doing it again. We all feel a hardship with this dillemna, feeling that she needs more help than our meetings can give her. So our chair person talked to her about getting into a rehab center for help. Our chair person tried to help her do this, by making some calls to find a bed for her, but her insurance would not cover it. Funny thing - the state will pay for it with medicaid, but her insurance through her employment won't.  So at this point - we are at a loss. Not sure where to go from here, we want to help her any way we can, but have come to a wall.  Any suggestions?

We live in Allegan, Michigan - that is where our NA group is based. Any help is appreciated.

Meetings that tell useing addicts not to speak/share are breaking traditions.

The NA traditions clearly state that even a useing member is an equal

to the non useing addict,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

It works How and Why

Step 12,Pg,120
It is absolutely none of our business to decide who is ready to here the message of
recovery and who is not.
Any addict,regardless of clean time,should be able to pour out his or her pain
in an atmosphere free of judgment.
Tradition 1Pg 125,We share an equal membership in NA.
Tradition 2 Pg 142,Every member has a part in the development of group
conscience.
Tradition 3
“The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using.”
 Pg 145,Just as we are not capable of measuring another’s
desire to stay clean, neither are we equipped to decide who should
join. We are free to offer welcome instead of judgment.
Any addict who walks into a meeting,
even a using addict, displays a level of willingness that cannot
be discounted.
Pg 149, Pressuring new members to
talk or act like we do may send them back to the streets. It certainly
denies them the right to recover and learn in their own way.
Pg 150 Anonymity is the principle that supports the openness of our
groups and our freedom to welcome everyone as equals. NA has no
classes of membership and no second-class members. The common
denominator in NA is the disease of addiction. We are all equally
subject to its devastation. We share an equal right to recovery.
Tradition 4 Pg 151 NA groups have a great deal of freedom. Weâve already seen in
Tradition Three that groups are free of any need to screen their members
or set requirements for membership. Our NA groups are free to
offer recovery to any addict. The Fourth Tradition enhances that freedom,
allowing the rich diversity of our varied experience to help us serve.
Pg 153 As long as a
group observes the Twelve Traditions and espouses the Twelve Steps
of NA in its meetings, it may consider them Narcotics Anonymous
meetings.
Pg 155 Autonomy does not relieve groups of their obligation to observe
and apply the spiritual principles embodied in the traditions.
Tradition 5 Pg 162  What can we do to make new members feel more
at home?